Where did the women go?

Those that follow me on either Twitter (@zaevdutt) or Facebook (www.facebook.com/zaevdutt) will immediately come to the conclusion that they know what this post is about after reading the heading.

They're going to say "Uh Oh! Here we go again. He's going to post about how there aren't enough good single women around!". Well you're in for a surprise. 

While I could post about that and make it interesting, while keeping in mind that it is true. I shall refrain from doing so.

You see my last post pretty much answers that question. Like I said, all the interesting women are taken at a young age by men who are easily old enough to be their Uncles. There isn't much that can be done about that. We can talk about how guys like me drive away potential single women by getting them upset while innocently asking questions like "How many men have you slept with?", but that would just be digressing.

On a side note: Why is it OK for men to talk about the women they've slept with but when you ask a woman, it's not OK? I mean we can't even ask them their age, and then you wonder why there are so many child molesters around.

It's simple really, most 15 or 16 year old's look like they're 20 going on 25. Whose fault is that? Well between the Media, the cosmetic companies and the companies producing Dairy products, it's a damn near toss up. On another tangent, I met a "French" girl today and I hate to say it, but the French really need to work on whom they chose to represent their country abroad. She claimed to be 21 while looking 25. Then she got upset at me for guessing she was 25. If you want to look younger, wear some makeup! 

Sigh, I apologize for digressing. Let's get back to the subject at hand. All of you, my avid readers think I'm about to go on a rant and rave about how there just aren't enough good quality single women around. I apologize if this make's it sound like I'm comparing them to a side of beef. Some comparison's can't be avoided. However, you will be glad to know that's not what I'm talking about. 

What I am going to rant and rave about is the complete downfall of women's sports today. 

First a couple of disclaimers, I don't personally follow women's sports. I know they play a lot of sports and they take it very seriously. For example there is the WNBA (Women's National Basketball Association - Yes a lot of thought went into that name), or even the LPGA (Ladies Professional Golf Association). Hell I've even seen a women's criket world cup being aired on T.V. I"m not sure what it's called, and I really refuse to put in the effort in to find out. After all its a bunch of women completely covered playing the world's most boring sport (Yes, Cricket falls at number 1 just ahead of Bass fishing on the list of 10 Most Boring Sports!). 

So anyway, most of you women are probably wondering "Why is there about to be a downfall in women's sports?". The answer is simple. There aren't enough people watching and hence the sponsors are leaving.

Think about it, when was the last time you watched any women's sports? By the way, Tennis doesn't count and for the record that's probably the most successful of the lot and still heading towards catastrophe. Nobody wants to watch another Williams Finals. That's third on the list of "Top 10 most boring things to do, preceded by watching Women's cricket and Bass fishing". 

This is what people don't get about Men. Most Manly Men are scared to death of displaying any affection for their fellow Manly Men unless of course it's in private. In which case there will be a lot of Man Hugs and Fist Bumping. However in public it's an entirely different ball game. 

You see men only allow their feelings to come out in public when watching sports. When you're a "dude" and you're watching the game, any game, you are allowed to shed a tear if your team is losing. You're allowed to kiss another guy if your team wins a big championship. If you're team is winning, taking off your shirt and swinging it around while you hug as many other men as possible is completely acceptable. When playing sport's you're even allowed to encourage fellow team member's by giving them a pat on their behinds.

Does anybody get where I'm going with this? 

Men are allowed to display their feelings for other men when watching sports. It is completely acceptable. In fact, most people would say to hold back any emotion especially while watching a group of men pummeling each other would be heresy. 

So I ask you again, why do women's sports fail? 

Simply because men refuse to follow it. Sure we quote lines such as "They aren't as big, or athletic enough" or how about "They just don't compete as hard!". 

Come on we all know that's not true. Women know that when it comes to sport's they have a lot more to prove than men, hence they train harder, play harder. I agree the game might not be as physical but it's a damn sight more fluid and natural, especially in this age of PED's (Performance Enhancing Drugs). 

Nope, the reason we don't follow it is because it doesn't allow any of us a way to release our "deeply hidden" emotions.

After all a man who shed's a tear watching a bunch of women lose... well that just makes them gay right? 

The problem in women's sports is that women refuse to watch it. Today, if all the women world over decided that watching the WNBA was a good way to release stress and a great way to bond, do you really believe the WNBA would be short of sponsors and on the doorstep of closing down? 

In fact, most women would force their boyfriends / husbands to go with them to these games. It would work like a chick flick. There is a reason that "The Proposal" will go on to make as much money as "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen".

Fact: Women want to see Ryan Reynold's strutting his stuff along with Sandra Bullock. Then spend the rest of the week imagining their boyfriends look like Ryan Reynolds rather than Ron Jeremy.  

So what would be the simplest solution to avoiding the failure of women's sports? The solution to give women freedom world over? 

You have two options:

1) Have women play all play sports while dressed up in Bikini's. If you can't attract the women, you might as well get the men. The only "sports organization" that has it right today is the WWE. They know sex sell's. So they have busty attractive women that are scantily clad beating the shit out of each other.

Well them and beach volleyball. 

2) Target all the women out there. After all they make up a large part of the population and they wield the power of "The Wallet". Make them care about women's sports the way they care about fashion and accessorizing. 

I want to take this time to let you know, I really don't mean to come off cynical or negative. I don't mean to criticize or belittle. I am just stating a truth. 

If women's sports wants to survive the recession and / or get to the next level, they either need to target all the non homosexual women in the world today or they simply dumb down the sport and strip to their birthday suits because in the end those are the only two options that will save them. 

Either way should make for an interesting time. 

Posted via web from Zaev's Hole in the Wall